Updating and everything in between

Well, here we are in November, I just can't believe the time flies by so fast.  Our paperwork is still somewhere in the sea of Kazakhstan.  I am beginning to think that someone spilled coffee on it and just threw it away, but then I read others blogs who were registered at the MFA around the same time and their paperwork hasn't moved either.  I realize that right now I could blame my agency, but that wouldn't really be fair since the paperwork is out of their hands, I could get frustrated at the process, but what good would that do me, I entered this process knowing that no matter how stable a process may be, it is ever changing in the world of international adoption.  Some days I don't want to read other blogs because I just don't think that I can bear to hear that they have a region assignment or that they are going to meet their child, but then I read them anyway and think someday that will be Jeff and I!  Ours prayers are fervent as we pour out our longing to have our child in our home.  There is a plan, THERE IS A PLAN!  Things will come together and when they do we will have a better, deeper understanding of this journey that we are on and we will be better equipped to face challenges in the future.  Things are bright and there is a light at the end of the tunnel, there are just a few curves to go through that are blocking the end.

"The Lord is good to those whose hope is in Him, to the one who seeks Him; It is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord."  Lamentations 3:25-26

Running, fall and other some such topics

Well, here we are in October!  I really do enjoy this time of year.  The leaves are starting to change and the temperatures are getting cooler and with these cooler temps comes CHILI!!! Yep this weekend is the official 3rd annual Gertson Ghoulish Chili Cook-off!  We have been trying to get things ready and by that I mean finish laying ceramic tile in our master bath and closet.  We are going to have a house full of people, as many as 30+ including kids and one bathroom, that will NEVER work, so Jeff, bless his heart, is working like a mad fiend to get it finished before Saturday so I can return the clothes to their rightful resting place instead of in a pile on the spare room bed and then I get to clean, clean, clean!  I also am scheduled to work 4 days this week, which is good, BUT I would have loved the time to get things ready for Saturday.  Oh Well!  

Took our puppy for a run this evening and it was nice and invigorating.  I run down a gravel road for a little while and really get to bask in the beauty of nature and the season.  Just the other day there were still walnuts and leaves on the walnut trees, they are now bare as a newborn baby.  It goes by so fast.

I have been doing a women's Bible study at my church for the last five weeks.  It is called "Discerning the Voice of God" by Pricilla Shirer.  It is a really great study for where I am at right now with our adoption.  It has challenged me and encouraged me.  She doesn't give a magic equation that guarantees success, that depends on the individual, but she gives guidance as to how to better tune in and test what you hear.

Our adoption is still in the same place it was before, hasn't budged.  It is all good though because God is working and moving and all things will happen in His time and no sooner.  In the mean time we have been busy updating paperwork for our dossier.  I was terribly stressed about this until I took a look at the dates on our USCIS papers and realized that I had a lot more time than I was thinking I had, so now I can breath!  YAY!  

Words of Wisdom:

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.  Romans 15:13

Encouragement for the trip

I have been running across different scripture, some are new and some are old verses that I have marked and I thought that I would try to share one every so often with the hope that they might lift and encourage my fellow bloggers as they have encouraged Jeff and I on our journey.

The vision is yet for the appointed time; It hastens toward the goal, and it will not fail.  Though it tarries, wait for it; For it will certainly come, it will not delay.  Habakkuk 2:3

The JOY that comes after the trials

No, this is not an announcement pertaining to the joy that comes after much trial and suffering, but rather a personal revelation.  It is often times difficult to keep feelings of happiness and excitement and anticipation in adoption as month after month goes by with little movement or news.  Just the other day I was experiencing one of those down days, you know the ones where you go to the room that you have designated the baby's room and feel all sad that it is just a room you are looking at and not a baby sleeping in that room, well, after much prayer and thought and more prayer I began to see my way through the fog and found my faith on the other side.  This process is long, it is hard, it is painful and arduous, but is it worth it...yes!  And I haven't even gotten to the end of my journey, whatever end that may be.  It grows us all in some way.  All these thoughts were summed up this morning by something I heard in church.  "[Jesus] looked to the Joy after the cross; after the suffering."  That was how he got through the horrible ordeal of the cross, by looking to the joy that came afterward.  Now do I think that my adoption journey compares to the suffering on the cross... not even close, but it is suffering none-the-less.  As Halloween approaches I am reminded of the plans we had for picking out pumpkins this year with our Baby G, that is not going to happen this year, but oh how much greater the joy it will be when we DO finally get to enjoy it with our little one in tow! Christmas will be so much sweeter and all the days in between that we get to share and learn and grow with Baby G.  Do I wish that all this was happening now, this year... yes, but I am going to choose to look to the joy that comes after the trials and the waiting and waiting AND waiting.  For now I will take up my cross daily knowing that joy comes in the morning!  

What a ride

So it's that time again, time for me to come up with something provocative to say, something full of meaning and significance, a profound announcement, but alas that is not the case. The most recent news was from the Committee of Child Rights Protection stating that dossiers that specified a gender would be returned.  I felt sick for all the families that have come so far in the process only to have to start the wait over again if they chose to continue in their decision to adopt from Kaz.  Not to say that a childisn't worth the wait, because he or she is, but the wait is the hardest part...Well, needless to say Jeff and I are not among these PAPs and do not have to make the difficult decisions they are.  We determined early on that we didn't care if we were gifted with a boy our girl, we just wanted a child to share our home, hearts and lives with.  So where does that put us, the same place we have been for the last four months, the MFA.  Yep we haven't moved.  We are gearing up for the fall and as we do we find ourselves thinking, "Last year we thought we would have our baby here to share this with."  I love Halloween, it rates just above Christmas as far as I am concerned and last year aswe searched and found a local pumpkin patch we became excited about the prospect of sharing the experience with our child this year, not to be.  Well the point of this entry wasn't to be sad.  On a happier note, we have added a new furry family member.  His name is Mooshoo and as soon as I get a pick I will add it to the blog.  This was an unplanned adoption, someone dumped him by our house and he found his way into our yard.  He is a little yellow tabby, though when he arrived he was a little worse for the wear.  He had a ouchie on his nose (usually caused when they throw them from the vehicle in a hurry) and his front canine is missing (I don't know if it will come back or not)  He has adjusted quite well with the rest of our motley crew and even our older cat, Chopstix, plays with him and doesn't his at him anymore.  If this adoption doesn't go through soon we may have to open a zoo at this rate!  Actually, no more pets we are at maximum capacity.

The other exciting thing is our chili cook-off.  We have in in October of every year, actually this is just the third year for the cook-off, but for two

years prior we had a halloween party. Anyway, I have been working on a theme and decorating ideas for the house and of course what I will wear for a costume.  It is always great fun and good food!  This year I am going with a mad scientist lad and running the invitations like a want ad and old newspaper clippings, but the best part of all is the picture I photoshopped of Jeff...

Yes, I set his eyebrows on fire, no it is not supposed to look totally real, think more tabloid sensationalism!  I laughed the whole time I did it.  At any rate it will be fun.  

With all the uncertainty in the IA world especially as we are experiencing it, I have had a lot of encouragement from some unlooked for sources, but I will just end with we started this race and we intend of finishing strong 

Therefore, since through God's mercy we have this ministry we do not lose heart...We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.  II Corinthians 4:1, 8-9 

What a FUN Video!!

Anyway, My brother sent me this video and I thought it was great and well, doesn't really have anything to do with adoption , but it does show that no matter where you go in the world people are people and we aren't really all that different!!  Enjoy!  Do you think they would dance with me in Kazakhstan? LOL!  It on the left side of the page!

Ramblings of a mad woman and other such nonesense

So, I have just been wanting to post on our blog, but with no new news to share and nothing exciting happening I have been at odds with myself trying to think of what to write about.  I have finally given into my urge to write and am dedicating this entry to my mad ramblings.  

I have recently watched the movie "Nomad: the warrior".  I won't say that it was my all time favorite film and that it is a must see for everyone, but for me it was poignant and enlightening.  It enabled me to catch a glimpse at the beautiful country that our child is from and that glimpse only makes one that much more eager to immerse yourself into their culture and heritage.  The movie really excelled in getting across how much pride the people have in their heritage and traditions.  Their history is deep and is woven into the steppes that they call home.

On another note, my agency sent us a weekly update and with it was a link to a utube video of the Kazakhstan national anthem.  It was beautiful and like the movie reverberated the pride of the people, their unceasing and unwavering commitment to the country and the land they call home as well as their way of life.  Along with the link our agency also sent the english translation, but it didn't really do the anthem justice.  It is so much stronger and proud and hauntingly beautiful in the language it is sung in.  Unfortunately, I am not familiar enough with either the Kazakh language or the Russian language to differentiate between the two.  

So now I come to the part of my entry that really starts to ramble...the adoption, our wait, and my ever increasing eagerness to take one more, even small, step forward.  Everyday we wait for word that our paperwork has moved, wishing that it would and thinking of all the families before us that have been waiting that much longer.  One day we will be one of those families.  I also think about those families that are just a step or two behind us and wonder how they will weather this waiting game and what they will be thinking when they reach the stage that we are at.  I know that everyday that passes is one less day that we have to wait and one day closer to Baby G.  We still haven't made a decision whether we will both make two trips or if I will stay for the duration and only Jeff will make two trips.  I so want to make just one trip, to have the time not only to spend with our little one, but also to immerse myself into the culture and the people.  I love to experience the different cultures on a personal level rather than a tourist level.  Here I go rambling on about traveling and as far as we know we haven't even made it to the MOE, much less gotten a region assignment or LOI.  I am out of words or at least words that when put together create a coherent thought so I will sign off for now and continue waiting, knowing that everything has a season and will happen in God's perfect timing even the creation of our little family.